Purity is a choice


It seems to be something rare nowadays. It is a struggle for everyone. Because even though we were not made to people pleasers..we live in this mentality. If you dictate the way you live by the music culture..your struggle for purity will be even greater. If you dictate the way you live on God’s word..it won’t seem like such a struggle.

What shows our purity?

The way we talk can determine our purity.
The way we dress can determine our purity.
The things we watch can determine our purity.
The things we read can determine our purity.

Purity is not just about abstaining from sex until marriage. It starts in your heart. Purifying your heart is the first step in the process of purity. Purity comes from within. And if your heart is unclean, then it will show on the outside. This also applies to men. A woman or man that has their eyes fixed on Jesus, keeps themselves in a state of repentance. That is the first start to finding purity on the inside. Realizing that what we do daily is not pleasing God, but ourselves.

Be a woman of purity. Be a man of purity.

Talk like a woman of purity. If out of your mouth spews nothing but meaningless words, work on that. You can get an impression from the way a woman speaks. Sometimes it could be the wrong impression. And you could end up in a uncomfortable situation.


Dress like a woman of purity. Be careful not to spin mens’ imaginations, which would lead them further away from their purity. I’m not saying you have to be covered from head to toe. But dress in a way that you would on a date with Jesus.


Watch out for what you let your eyes see. I am guilty of this. I used to watch anything and everything. And afterwards, I felt grief. What we watch stays in our brains for years, months, days. Even minutes.


Reading can open up your world to something destructive or something exciting. Men, when you read those adult magazines, robs you of your purity. Robs you of your future relationships. Women, when you watch those Nicholas Sparks movies, you are creating an ideal form of relationships. Relationships that don’t exist. Is it fun to read about romance? Absolutely. Because it is something that we all wish for. But..sometimes you can lose sense of reality. And it can harm your thinking or judgment. You may ignore those red flags because he reminds you of Noah Callhoun. You could fall away or be willing to compromise your beliefs. Don’t.

I will share my experience living as a virgin with all of you. And I will be flat out blunt about it. It is not easy. I used to escape with movies and television. I used to disrespect my body because of it. Those sexual images in the love scenes would feed something inside me. And I would act on it. I felt disgusting afterwards even though people told me it was natural. But I felt it wasn’t. I still feel this way. I am robbing myself of being the pure vessel I want to be. And so, after praying, God is taking away the desire from me. He doesn’t intend for me to feel ashamed. And I would kick myself repeatedly. I would justify it with…well I don’t have anyone in my life. What is a girl to do?!?! But, because God sees that I do want to change, He is helping me.

I have never had a relationship. Ever. I have never experienced any of it. You can see how a virgin’s mind can wander. Most of my dreams were about love and sex. It’s not wrong to think about sex. God created sex. It is wrong to feed your eyes and thoughts with it. Because the more you think about it, the more it consumes you. And it can become an addiction or obsession. It can block God from becoming number one in your life. And that becomes sin. It can ruin relationships. Marriages. Families.

Remember this. Next time you watch that movie or talk in a manner that is unladylike or ungentlemen like, you are setting yourself up for a life of impurity. We are human. We do mess up. We are an imperfect people. But…God’s grace is eternal. He loves us. He knew he would mess up. I mess up daily.

And let me say…if you have given up your purity, you don’t have to dwell on it the rest of your life. We are not defined by the things we do. But we are defined by the things we do after we realize they were not the right things. You can find purity again. You can become washed and clean again. Just keep in a state of repentance and humility.  If you’ve been robbed of your purity, it is NOT your fault.  God can restore your body and your heart. I am not passing judgment on anyone in this post. I don’t have the right to do that. But I am trying to help you find your way to or back to purity.



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